JUDGE: Miss Sorrel, are you seriously claiming this man is an expert, after knowing the accused for just five minutes?
SHERLOCK: Two minutes would have made me an expert. Five was ample.
JUDGE: Mr. Holmes, that’s a matter for the jury.
SHERLOCK: Oh, really?
SHERLOCK: One librarian; two teachers; two high-pressured jobs, probably the City.
SHERLOCK: The foreman’s a medical secretary, trained abroad judging by her shorthand.
JUDGE: Mr. Holmes!
SHERLOCK: Seven are married and two are having an affair – with each other, it would seem! Oh, and they’ve just had tea and biscuits.
SHERLOCK: Would you like to know who ate the wafer?
JUDGE: Mr. Holmes. You’ve been called here to answer Miss Sorrel’s questions, not to give us a display of your intellectual prowess.
(Sherlock takes a breath but can’t help smiling a little at the acknowledgement of his ‘intellectual prowess’. John stares at him sternly.)
JUDGE: Keep your answers brief and to the point. Anything else will be treated as contempt. Do you think you could survive for just a few minutes WITHOUT SHOWING OFF?!
Tumblr: #this fucking donut #can we talk about this fucking donut for a minute #can we #because on this donut #the sprinkles just comfortably melt into the icing #you can tell that they are so perfectly in tune with each other #and they’ve come so far from when the sprinkles just sort of sat on top #barely touching for fear of rejection #just ugh I can’t #otp: comfortably melting
4chan: here’s a picture of someone putting their dick in a donut.
reddit: that donut needs to go back into the kitchen and make me a sandwich.
academia.edu: Here is a pdf of the seminar paper I wrote about the erotics/poetics/semiotics/science of donut eating.
deviantArt:I did not steal this donut. I traced it so now it’s mine.
It got better
Fanfic.net: The donut is the setting for a high school AU, where two sprinkles meet and realise they have more in common than they ever thought possible, however, the mean chocolate sauce has caught wind of their secret relationship. Will they be able to make it together before it’s too late? M for a lemon flavoured donut.
This has officially become one of my favorite posts.
I JUST REBLOGGED BUT FANFIC MADE IT PERFECT
Ladies and gentlemen, I present you with: The Internet.
why would u even WANT a horizon
idk just fucking bring it to me
this is quite possibly the best post on tumblr
And certainly not the best friend of the bravest and kindest and wisest human being I have ever had the good fortune of knowing.
This sums up my relationship with most people I know.
there’s always that one character where you’re like “tbh I love this character bc I am this character”
WELCOME TO SEA WORLD YOU LITTLE FUCKERS
NO THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU’VE DONE
There’s a book sitting in front of you.
In it contains all the bad things people have said about you behind your back, would you open it?
Hell fucking yeah
Read it so you can find out what people really have to say about you and how you can change your character to be a better person.
read it so you know what order to murder people in
two kinds of people